FHE: The Importance of Choosing Good Friends

This lesson is most appropriate for older children (8 and older). Its objective is to illustrate how our lives are affected by the type of friends we choose to be around.
Before Family Home Evening, I prepared 4 envelopes, each with a name from the following story written on the front. (Sam, Kate, Mitch, Betty) I cut out the number strips (found at the end of the story) for each name, and placed all 6 in each envelope.

We started by reading the section in For the Strength of Youth entitled "Friends". 

Choose your friends carefully. They will greatly influence how you think and act, and even help determine the person you will become. Choose friends who share your values so you can strengthen and encourage each other in living high standards. A true friend will encourage you to be your best self.
To have good friends, be a good friend yourself. Show interest in others and let them know you care about them. Treat everyone with kindness and respect. Go out of your way to be a friend to those who are shy or do not feel included.
Invite your friends of other faiths to your Church meetings and activities, where they can learn about the gospel. Help them feel welcome and wanted. Many people have joined the Church through the example and fellowship of their friends. Don’t be offended if your friends decline your invitation to learn more about the gospel. Just continue to be their friend.

Next, I emphasized how important it is to surround ourselves with good friends. I then read the children the following story.

CHOOSE YOUR FRIENDS CAREFULLY!


One morning, you wake up and as you open your eyes, you realize that it is Saturday. As you snuggled down in your warm bed, you think about what fun things you might do that day. You decided to call a friend on the phone. (HAVE EACH CHILD CHOOSE FRIEND ENVELOPE, but do not read open it)

Your friends mother answered the phone and tells you... (Have each child remove paper #1, and read it out loud)

She says, “I will have them call you as soon as they are available.” You climb out of bed, thinking about your friend and their example. Sometimes you wish you could be more like them. You pour yourself a bowl of cereal. In your mind, you are thinking about your science project due next week, but you really don’t feel like doing it. As you sit there wondering what to do, the phone rings. It is your friend. They say, (#2)

Before you know it the day is half way over, and it is time for lunch– and finally some free time to hang out with your friend and have some fun. You and your buddy decide to go to McDonald's for a burger. As you are walking in, you see a little boy who has fallen off his bike, spilled his money, and scraped his knee. You and your friend... (#3)

After lunch, you friend excitedly tells you they have a surprise they have been wanting to show you. Your friend... (#4)

You tell your friend that you need to go home for dinner, because you told your parents you would be home, and don’t want them to worry. Your friend says, (#5)

After dinner, you spend a little while getting ready for the party. You have been excited about this party all week. When you and your friend get there, you realize... (#6)

That night, as you climb back into bed, you think about your very busy day. How do you feel? Are you proud of your actions? Did your friend help you be your best self? Are you more like your Savior now than you were this morning? Are you happy? Who are you going to spend your time with tomorrow?

The End


SAM:
#1– I'm sorry, Sam is not available. He left early this morning to go weed the neighbors garden.


#2– Hey man! My mom said you called. I am almost done weeding, but wondered if you want to help me finish. I am using this weeding project for my Science fair. I thought you might want to work on it together. My neighbor said she would treat us to lunch after.

#3– Help the little boy up, dust off his knees, gather up his money, and call his Mother on your phone. After his mom comes, you go in to McDonald's, and the manager says he saw your kindness. He gives you your meal for free.

#4– Takes you to the car and pulls out some of your favorite cookies he made for you. He has a few extra plates too. You spend the next couple hours delivering them to your friends around town.

#5– “OK, tell your parents I said ‘Hi’. Bytheway, do you want to Jen’s party later? You decide to go, and agree that Sam will pick you up later that night.

#6– That the party is not appropriate! Your friend suggests that you leave. The 2 of you decide to go buy some treats and rent a movie together instead. You watch it at your house, and have a great time.

KATE:
#1– I'm sorry, Kate is not available. She went to help babysit so our friend could go to the temple.


#2– Hi. I just got home. I need to finish my homework, but wondered if you want to meet up for lunch? You decide to quickly get your science project done while you wait.

#3– Help the little fella up, and bring him inside to call his mom. Your friend uses some of the money she earned babysitting to buy him an ice cream while you wait.

#4– Brings you back to her house where she gives you a picture she painted. You spend the next couple hours painting together, and working in your talents.

#5– “Oh man, we are having so much fun! You call and ask if Kate can come home with you for dinner? Your mom says that is fine. It works out good, because you plan on going to a party together later that night anyway.

#6– That the party is a surprise party given by your parents for you and all of your friends. They wanted to thank you for always being so obedient. You feel proud of yourself and your friend, and have a great time.


MITCH:
#1– I'm sorry, Mitch is not available. He is still asleep in his room. He came home very late.


#2– Dude, I am so tired. Your phone call woke me up. Thanks a lot! I'm going back to bed, but I will call you for lunch and we can hang out.

#3– Push the kid out of the way and go in Mc Donalds.

#4– Brings you back to his car, where he pulls out some gross magazines. You didn’t want to see them, but you feel trapped, and cant help but look.

#5– “Do you always do what your mom says?” You feel a little embarrassed and decide to skip dinner and go to your friends house instead. Your pretty hungry, and hope there will be some good food at the party you are going to later.

#6– That the party is really boring. Your friend insists you leave. You go to a park, and throw rocks in the pond. Before long, your friend starts throwing rocks at cars. A police car comes and – even thought you didn’t throw any rocks, you end up at the police station– in trouble and calling your mom.

BETTY:
#1– I'm sorry, Betty is not available. She didn’t come home last night, and I'm worried about her.


#2– Hey. I just got home and saw you called. I spent the night at Tami’s (or at least that's what I told my mom ha ha). I need to sleep, but I will pick you up later for lunch.

#3– Grab the little boys money, and buy an extra treat or 2.

#4– Takes you to a movie theater, where her older brother sneaks you into a rater R movie. You didn’t want to see it, but didn’t know how to say no.

#5– “Geesh! Your parents are so lame! I will pick you up later for the party.” You march into your house, angry at your parents for making you come home.

#6– That the party is wild. You aren’t very comfortable, but your friend convinces you it is alright. She passes you a drink (that tasted kind of funny) and.. Well... you don’t really remember much after that.

At the end of the story, I reassured my children that I know they have the ability to choose good friends., I explained that-- just like the envelopes, sometimes people look OK on the outside, and then you realize that they aren't necessarily what you had thought on the inside. It is important to be kind to everyone, but it is equally important to choose good people to spend your time with.